Trying To Be Normal
by fishxcustard
Summary: How River and The Doctor cope in a series of normal, non-life threatening situations...
1. Pancakes

"Two eggs River, you need to add another one in." The doctor passed her another egg.

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah!" He shoved the recipe in her face.

Her eyes scanned the recipe quickly.

"Fine you win." She huffed.

"Ooh, were we playing a game? I like games!" The doctor grinned.

"Well, we could be…" River began to back the doctor up against the kitchen counter.

"River! Amy and Rory could walk in any second now! We shouldn't-"

River cut him off, kissing him hungrily, and tugging at his braces. The doctor flailed his arms madly in shock before finally settling on her hips. River opened her mouth to him, pushing him up against the counter. The doctor's lips parted, their tongues twisting together. River shoved the doctor's tweed off and began working on the buttons on his shirt. The doctor's hands slid into River's hair, his fingers tangling into the endless curls.

"I'm very much liking your game River." The doctor gasped as River bit at his neck.

She laughed breathlessly. "I thought you might"

The doctor's shirt fell onto the floor. He quickly reversed their positions and lifted River up onto the counter, his hand sliding up her thigh.

"Ooh someone's being possessive-" She gasped as his fingers stroked her through the thin fabric of her underwear. He slipped one finger inside her. She moaned loudly, grinding into his hand as she dragged her nails down his back.

"River! Doctor! Really? God this is something I never wanted to walk in on. First thing in the morning too…" Amy looked away quickly.

The doctor hastily tore himself away from River and pulled on his shirt as River jumped off the counter, pulling down her skirt.

Rory was stunned speechless.

"Mum, dad…we were making you a special breakfast…as a surprise." River gestured toward the abandoned pancake batter.

"Well, it was a surprise I'll give you that!"


	2. Texting

"Sweetie, it doesn't work that way."

"Telepathic communication systems haven't been invented yet?" The doctor frowned.

"Spoilers, remember? You've got to use the same means of communication if you want to talk to Amy and Rory."

"But it's annoying!" The doctor wined childishly.

River rolled her eyes.

"It's not that hard sweetie, just type in what you want to say."

"The buttons on this so called 'mobile' phone thingy are quite fiddly…" The doctor stabbed at the buttons with his fingers, fumbling so much with the phone it almost slipped out of his hands.

River sighed. "Fine, I'll do it for you, just this once. What do you want to say?"

"I...I…" The doctor trailed off. "Let's just go see them River!" He jumped up and began madly running, pushing buttons and pulling levers on the console.

"Doctor," River began quietly, grabbing hold of him by the shoulders and steadying him. "You know if you go see them you'll want them to come back with you." She whispered.

"But…I miss them River." He whispered back.

As River looked into his eyes, she felt all he would never say. All the feelings he tried to bury. Guilt for wanting Amy and Rory to come back, regret in leaving them in the first place, his temptation to take them back, his love for them, but above all, his longing to see them again.

But River knew.

River knew if he went to see them again, he would break. She undoubtedly knew he'd pull them back into his wild, unpredictable adventures. And it would be inevitable that Amy and Rory's last trip with the doctor would have a far more horrific end.

"Doctor, you can't. Think about why you left them in the first place."

"But maybe it'll be okay. It's been okay so far." The tone of his voice was a little unsteady. He was trying to convince her as much as he was trying to convince himself.

"Oh, doctor." Came the quiet, broken, whisper from her throat.

She waited for him to grasp ludicrousness of what he was saying. And with that came the tears. She held his head to her chest, stroking his hair gently, occasionally stopping to plant a kiss to the top of his head as his tears wetted her top.

Long after the tears had subsided, they continued to sit wrapped up in each others arms, the time lord seeking comfort in the arms of River as the hours trickled by, bleeding into each other.


	3. Christmas Shopping

"Ooh River it's a pirate hat!" The Doctor pulled it on excitedly like he would never get a chance to again. He probably wouldn't if she'd brought her gun.

"Who would've thought I'd need a gun to go shopping." River mumbled to herself quietly, as the doctor checked him self out in the mirror.

"Alright sweetie, that's enough."

River yanked off his hat, shoved it on the rack and basically dragged the doctor out of the store.

"B-but River, it's a fancy dress store! It has cool stuff! Why do we have to leave?" The doctor protested.

"You said five minutes doctor! You've been dragging me around here for the last half an hour! We're not going to have enough time to get Amy and Rory's Christmas presents!"

"But…but River! Just a_little_ longer! Pleeease! We don't even know what we're getting them!" He argued, to no avail.

"_I_do. While you've been prancing around that store like a kid looking for a Halloween costume, I've decided what to get Amy and Rory."

"Nothing to do with the fancy dress store? I'm sure they'd love that." He hinted.

"Definitely not doctor, we're going to a normal clothing store and going to see if there's anything she'll like."

"I thought the whole point of shopping _together_ was to come to an agreement on a gift we both think they'll like?"

"Sweetie, you had your chance, you blew it with the hat shop. Plus I'm considerably more human than you are, so I've got a better idea of what they'll like."

"Yes but you can't deny the fact you're an alien too!" The doctor pointed out a lot louder than necessary.

A few people turned to stare at River as she dragged the doctor towards the clothing store.

"Doctor!" she squeaked.

The doctor grinned smugly back at her. Mission accomplished.

"You go look for something for Amy over there." She shoved him angrily toward a section of the store.

"Wait, wait River! You can't expect me to look for _girls_clothes!" Too late, she'd already disappeared into the maize of racks.

After fifteen minutes of aimless wandering around and muttering curses directed at River, he figured he'd go look for her as he wasn't exactly being very productive.

A few minutes later, to his relief he bumped into River in a section of the store he certainly didn't want to find her.

"River! You're…what are you doing here…?" His eyes widened as he took in the racks of clothing.

"I decided to get Amy a gift card." She smiled sweetly.

"You didn't even ask if I'd found anything! And if you're getting her a gift card, why are you here?" He gestured towards the clothing-if it can even be called that-awkwardly.

"I knew you wouldn't sweetie, I sent you off because I fancied a little privacy, is that too much to ask?"

"Yeah but Lingerie River?" He muttered quietly, blushing a deep red. "Let's just go pay." River grinned mischeviously, he was so utterly adorable when he was embarrassed.

"Already did" River skipped out of the store breezily.

The doctor stared after her.

"River! I give up! You win! I seriously can't find you."

After (finally) getting the shopping done, the doctor and River had retreated to TARDIS, River going about her own business and the doctor taking a shower. However, after his rather long shower River had…disappeared. He'd just spent the last ten minutes calling out for her and wandering through the TARDIS corridors.

Until he heard her giggle. That giggle could mean no good. And it was coming from his bedroom.

He pushed the door open cautiously to find River lounging on his bed in a way that made his trousers _very_tight. Now he understood why she'd wanted some privacy at the store. She was wearing an alarmingly small black corset with a red lace trim and black underwear.

Not that he was complaining.

The doctor's eyes travelled across River's body, taking in every inch of her skin; her breasts, pushed up and spilling out of the corset, the black fabric fitted tightly to her slim waist, and her long, tanned, gorgeous legs.

"Care to join me, Doctor?" She purred.

"I- River- I- You…" He stuttered, startled.

Until River, basically, jumped on him. She forcefully pushed him up against the wall and kissed him. _This__is__far__different__to__any__of__our__other__kisses_, the Doctor mused. _All__hot__and__wet__and__desperate__and__oh!_River had begun attacking the buttons on his shirt.

The doctor backed River towards the bad till the backs of her knees hit it and he fell directly on top of her.

"I must say River; I am quite pleased you didn't wait till Christmas to give me my present."


	4. Pyjama Day

"River?" Boy, was he nervous. His voice rang out small and shaky.

"Yes sweetie?"

"I was wondering…" He shuffled his feet, fiddling with his tweed and straightening his bowtie nervously in that adorable manner of his. "Would you like to share my bed tonight?"

River had to admit; she was surprised. She hadn't even let herself hope for something along these lines this early in his timeline. Indeed it was a bit of a shock, but she wasn't about to waste this opportunity. "Would love to, just give me a moment to put on something more comfortable." And she skipped off with a wink.

The Doctor gulped.

He slipped his most favourite pyjamas on, the purple ones with the green spots. Flawless combination purple and green was, and spots! Who doesn't love spots? Mmm, pyjamas are so soft. It's a wonder people ever bothered wearing normal clothes. Maybe he could trade his tweed for-

"Nice pjs, my love."

"Oh!" He jumped and turned to face River. "Hello River! Thanks, your look…" River's body was encased in a loose top, hem just stopping short of her waist, a sliver of her golden stomach on show. Her shorts exposed her legs in the most inviting way possible. "Gorgeous." Well, he knew that already, but he hadn't ever seen this much of her before, all at once…

"Oh darling, if I'd known my pyjamas had such an effect on you I'd never have bothered dressing up."

"I could certainly get used to that. Could you get the lights?" He climbed into bed.

"The old girl will get it for us." She murmured as she slipped under the covers. Moments later the lights flicked off. The Doctor could feel and hear River shifting under the covers. He felt her arm snaking around his waist and her head resting gently on his shoulder lightly. Her hair tickled. The Doctor stiffened, unsure how to react. River wriggled a little cuddling into his side. He hesitantly put an arm around his shoulders.

"Relax, darling." River whispered, her breath hot in his ear. The Doctor went limp, relaxing to her touch. River sighed contentedly. Her traced down her spine lightly, his fingers ghosting across her skin. The last thing he remembered was murmuring River's name softly, his voice barely audible. He promptly drifted off into unconsciousness.

The Doctor's eyelids fluttered open. Mmm, waking up to River's beautiful face was definitely something he could get used to.

"Morning." He mumbled sleepily, grinning at the woman in his arms.

"Morning sweetie." River unwound her arms from their embrace and stretched luxuriously, the covers slipping down her form as she did so.

"River?" The Doctor's eyes traced down River's body.

"Yeah?"

"Can we have a pyjama day today?" River met his eyes with a smile.

"Of course, my love."


End file.
